It indicates that you have not been loved enough

Indicate that you have not been loved enough: what child has been an adult who does not know how to love? The unloved syndrome

It indicates that you have not been loved enough

Love is the feeling that motivates us and leads us to improve. It is very much related to things like joy, family, satisfaction, care and we are all always looking for love. However, this search can turn into insatiable hunger or pain, and this is especially true if you have not received love or acceptance from your parents during childhood. But what are the signs that you have not been a beloved enough child?

That he was not loved by his parents

Obviously, it all starts in childhood. From that stage of life in which it is necessary to trust an adult figure, mainly the mother, to receive attention, satisfaction of basic needs, but also in which mirror, receive confirmations and acceptance.

If a child’s parents are emotionally healthy, children will develop a strong sense of self. They will feel a healthy, unconditional love that radiates from those closest to them. They will know what love is like and how it feels.

They will pursue this feeling throughout their lives. And that is why they will be able to comfort, love and develop strong and healthy relationships with those around them because they have a healthy role model they can trust.

Conversely, if parents are not emotionally resolved, children will develop a weak and unstable sense of self. They will not be able to console themselves, trust others, love each other and are unlikely to find fulfillment in adult relationships. In other words they don’t know what healthy love is like. They will only know that the care they receive causes them pain, and they will associate love with suffering.

  • First sign that they didn’t love you small enough: having developed the belief that Love is pain.

The wounds of the unloved

Over time, romantic and relationship experiences will be extremely painful and negative. It is common for unloved people to fall into relationships with people who are not emotionally available.

  • 2nd signal: always look for hurtful, often narcissistic couples.

The relationship with oneself is also affected by the lack of love in childhood: we are convinced that we do not deserve love like everyone else, that we are not a lovable person, and that we basically deserve unbalanced relationships.

  • 3rd signal: lack of self-love.

We enter a mental loop through which to receive love, to “convince” the mother or father that he loves us, we are pleased, we become good, but in adulthood this means no longer being able to set boundaries that are also functional for a same. -love and well-being.

  • 4th signal: one is extremely complacent with the partner, until he is completely annihilated.

Unwanted syndrome

According to research, the perception of parental love or rejection accounts for 26% of children’s psychological adjustment and 21% of children’s psychological adjustment.psychological adaptation of the adult. According to the Enduring Effects development model, the association between early parental love and positive results in adulthood is long-lasting and relatively constant during childhood, adolescence, and adulthood. This demonstrates and confirms that the effect of parental love or absence cannot be underestimated.

A child who was not loved from an early age will not only have problems with affection, but will develop an unhealthy idea of ​​love and being loved will most likely end up in a toxic relationship that will only exacerbate his or her feeling of not being deserving. . love.

In addition, according to the Harvard Grant Study, a unique study that tracked the lives of 268 students for 70 years, happy and successful lives are rooted in a good relationship with parents. A sense of parental acceptance, education and love in childhood is one of them best predictors of future successhappiness and life satisfaction for adults.

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