The first meeting with a person is crucial because it decides the type of relationship that will be established with them in the future. Making a “good impression” when you first meet your interlocutor is especially important when the first meeting corresponds to a job interview, an appointment with a new client, the first day of work with new colleagues, the first meeting as CEO. In the first meeting, in fact, everything is at stake.
What in jargon we tend to call “figure,” beautiful or ugly, is nothing more than the first impression. As soon as it comes in contact with someone, the amygdala, connected to the limbic brain, generates a judgment about the interlocutor in a period of time ranging from a minimum of 300 thousandths of a second to a maximum of a few seconds. During this time, the limbic brain asks three questions related to three different areas:
1) mastery: “do you have more or less power than me?”
2) Sexual compatibility: “Like it or not?”
3) kindness: “trust or not trust?”
Depending on the answers to these questions, the brain will derive the pattern of behavior to be implemented in the relationship with the person who generated the first impression, which will remain virtually unchanged for the next six months.
In addition to the three questions, someone’s first impression of the brain is also influenced by a number of factors that fall within the realm of nonverbal communication, namely:
– facial expression;
– eye contact;
– clothes, look, make-up;
– use of hands in gestures;
As can be seen from the list we have just drawn up, all the factors which contribute to influencing the first impression are under the control of the individual; this means that everyone is responsible for the first impression they generate of themselves up to 100%. Knowing them is a big advantage, as you can take steps to improve them and understand how to create a good first impression. Surely, in order to strategically manage the first impression that is transmitted to the interlocutor himself, it is necessary to take into account the three basic elements of the Strategic Communication:
1) I, who identifies the interests of those who communicate. Once identified, a strategy must be developed that allows you to generate a first impression of yourself in order to get there;
2) You, which corresponds to the interests of the interlocutor. Also in this case, it is necessary to adapt the factors that influence the first impression according to the person with whom you have to relate;
3) The context, that is, the objective (legal, economic, spatial, temporal) and subjective (people) elements that influence the relationship between the Self and the You.
Let’s take an example related to the process of staff selection and we identify with the self the candidate for the interview and with the You the recruiter. The candidate knows that, having as interlocutor the recruiter, whose power is to decide whether or not to hire him, will give you a good first impression by appearing at the job interview in elegant office suits, maintaining an upright and composed posture during the conversation, assuming an interested facial expression and gesturing. to convey their professional confidence. The adoption of a similar strategy, which takes into account the factors that could positively influence the recruiterin fact, it would reflect the interests of the candidate, or be hired.
However, this same strategy would not be appropriate in a different situation, precisely because -as I emphasize in Company profile – “there is no single winning style, but from time to time the most strategic attitude needs to be discovered“What do you value”all the elements of the relationship, depending on the objectives, the interlocutor and the context“.
A different strategy, then, will adopt an apical figure of a company during the first meeting with a potential partner if it wants, in addition to a good first impression, to convey its position of power and reliability. In this case, in addition to a dress code suitable for the meeting, for example, the person in question might decide to come with his assistant to take note of what has been established.
Oscar Wilde said: “There is never a second chance to make a good first impression for the first timeTherefore, I recommend that you immediately apply the tips learned in this article!
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